Wednesday, December 4, 2013

What the ???

What the heck...where did the last 3 months go??? some catching up to do.  Basically...nothing's  Well, except for my attitude.  I've decided I'm going to look on the bright side & to try to understand things from a different point of view.  ANDDDDDDDD I'm not going to allow work to stress me out.  I leave it all at the door now & I am happier than ever.  

I mean...what good does it do to fight against all the changes that I cannot change?  Nursing is no longer a healthcare career.  It is customer service...plain & simple.  Sure, we give meds & we do dressing changes & we try to teach out patients how to live a healthy lifestyle...but any nurse that works in a hospital knows that all that we learned in nursing school comes second to trying to please a patient & their family so that we get a good survey after they go home.  Because the only thing that matters is their perception of how clean & quiet the hospital was.  Why fight it?  I'm good at customer service.  It's part of the reason I connect so well with the majority of my patients.

The past couple of weeks I've had to take care of heroin addicts, crackheads & alcoholics.  This was definitely not what I pictured when I was in nursing school.  And I must say it is the hardest type of patients to care for....because they do not care about themselves & all that matters is their drugs & the me, me, me attitude.  I had one spitting on the floor the other morning.  I looked at her like WTF??? & told her to stop it.  She knows better, she just doesn't care.  And then she'd whine "no one cares about meeeeeeeeeeee."  She ended up leaving AMA (against medical advice).  I just don't have a high tolerance for this.  

We are sort of creating this attitude though.  We cater to their every need...and don't get as much as a thank you.  I don't know, maybe I say thank you too much.  Something as simple as a waiter refilling my glass of water will warrant a thank you from me.  At work, I run my ass off for 12 hrs & it still isn't enough.  But remember my first isn't going to stress me out anymore.  I can only do what I can do.  I will continue to try my best to make someone's night a little better.  And when I go all stays behind in the hospital.  I'm not taking that stress home.

Nuff said.  Moving on.  I'm still with my guy.  I tried to end it...a few times.  He doesn't go away...and I don't mean in an annoying, stalking type way.  We work through the issues & right now things are pretty good.  Who knows what the future holds.  I'm not going to worry about that either.  Life is short...enjoy each precious day.

That CEO of the other hospital I posted about in my last post.......she got fired.  Big  I haven't heard much else about that hospital lately.

Our employee survey....the results were not as great as they hoped.  Another big shock.  Nothing has changed...they still continue to short staff us on purpose.  They call it productivity.  Yeah, ok.  Sigh.

The Gators were the worst ever this year.  Luckily, my alma mater, UCF is doing great!  GO UCF!!!

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Not Much

Not much to really say about work lately.  Why?  Cause I've only worked the equivalent of one shift in the last 2 weeks.  I called in sick last week...for 3 days in a row.  And this week I was only scheduled for 2 shifts....I got put on call Tuesday...only to be called in at 10 pm.  Ugh...and to ICU.  It turned out to be ok.  I can guarantee you I'll never be an ICU nurse though.  It just isn't for me.  And I went to work Wednesday night & my charge nurse called me at 10:30 & said "Hey, do you want to go home at 11?"  Uhhhh, heck yeah!!!!!!!!!  It is rare that this ever happens any more & the stars had aligned cause I didn't carpool that night either.  My paycheck isn't gonna be pretty...but my peace of mind is skyrocketing.  

I don't know if other hospitals are doing this...but my hospital admin is obsessed with controlling blood sugars.  I mean to the point that we are making practically everyone hypoglycemic by morning time.  So they switched it up, but it is OCD I tell you.  To the point that on some patients we are doing accuchecks every 2 hours.  We don't have any endocrinologists that come to our hospital.  I think without an expert in the field, we will never be able to come up with something that actually works.  So instead, we will poke & prod & over-medicate these people...just to make admin happy.  In the past, they actually had us giving insulin to those with a blood sugar of 121 or bedtime.  Ummmm, I don't think anything under 150 at bedtime is anything to worry about.  They are going to sleep & not getting breakfast until 8:30 am.  Over 15 hours since they had dinner.  Sigh.

On a bright football is back.  Go Gators!!!!!!

I have decided to end things with my guy.  I just don't feel I'm a priority in his life...sooo see ya.  He won't go away though.  Wish me luck.

The other hospital in the area that is our competition is having some real struggles.  They have decided to cut the nightshift differential in half.  That's basically a $10,000 pay cut for each night nurse.  Admin states they have order to meet the budget.  Mind you, the CEO gave herself a $120,000 raise though.  So instead of a million dollars, she makes $1,120,000.  Is that not insane?  And the hospital is going downhill.  No wonder we have been so busy the entire year.  I hear hospital morale is non-existent.  That's sad.  They are also laying off 400 people....but giving the doctors $500,000 bonuses.  And that is after acquiring a doctors group for $50 million.  I will never work in admin.  I just can't screw people over like they do.

We had our employee survey last month.  They say a record number completed the survey...93%.  Can't wait to see those results.  I hope people were honest & not brainwashed with all the meetings we had about it.

And on a final's nearly fall!!!!!!!!  Which means pumpkin everything!  Yum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, August 23, 2013


I had the cops called on ME.  Yep...ME.  One of my patients was mad her daughter left & for some reason claimed I wasn't her nurse.  We aren't talking about a little old confused lady either.  We are talking about someone less than 10 years older than me & totally alert & oriented.  I would categorize her as in has her family wrapped around her finger & isn't happy when there isn't anyone in the room giving her attention.  So she called 911.  And a cop showed up.  And I got a lecture from the security guard regarding the fact that cops don't like coming to the hospital for stuff like this.  Ummm....hello...I didn't tell her to call 911.  Direct your lecture to the patient.  Heck, give her a ticket for wasting their time.  I shook my head & walked off to check on my other patients.  The ones with real health problems.  

I swear...I think back to nursing school & that semester spent in psych nursing & declaring I'll never be a psych nurse....HAHAHAHAHAHA.  At least 50% of my patients are in for psych reasons & not medical.  Sometimes they are medical, but you still have to deal with the psych side too.  And with them closing down the majority of pain clinics & pain doctors who were abusing the streets with prescription pain killers...well, we may as well be a psych hospital.  So many drug addicts, so little time.  We have so many frequent flyers now.  Discharged one day, back the next.  Because they will get admitted & we'll give them the strongest pain meds we have...and they don't even have to pay for it.  That's what healthcare is turning into.  Maybe Obamacare will crack down on stuff like that...I can only hope.  Since it will all be tracked in one national database.  We'll be able to see exactly when & where & why you are seeing a doctor or going to another hospital.  That is about the only good thing I see coming out of this national healthcare push.

To top it off...on that survey they get when discharged...the survey that determines if the hospital loses 1% of their income....they ask if their pain was controlled.  HA!  Their pain is never controlled enough.  We cannot win on that question.  Asking a drug addict if they got enough pain medication to their satisfaction.  If we gave them what they wanted, they'd overdose & they don't even care.  Seems like so many just want to drift through life.  It's sad.  I know some start out with a legitimate need for the medication & end up hooked.  But I would say that is a small majority.  

Alright, enough about that.  Not even sure how I got there.  We got called into an impromptu meeting the other morning & basically chastised that we all have bad attitudes & it is affecting the patients so please leave your attitude at the door.  WTF?  Why not address the reasons we may have bad attitudes & work towards changing that?  The leadership we have had the last couple of years is awful.  Yeah, I'm saying it...awful.  The staff is not the problem.  We have a great staff & we put up with a lot of b.s.  We are not the problem.  

It is like they want us to be robots with no personality or thoughts.  Just do as I say & don't talk back.  Do you know there are some nurses being called into the office because their shoe laces are are different color than white or black?  Or their shoes have some other color than white or black on them.  How does that affect their ability to be a nurse?  It's bad enough we are all in the generic navy blue scrubs, but now we can't even have a pink or blue line on our shoes?  That makes us non-professional?  Shoe laces?  Seriously?????????

Sigh, just when I think they can't possibly think up anything else to add to our job or complain about....there is always something more.  And now we have techs....great.  But we need to ask them "nicely" to do their job or just do it ourselves.  We have to ask them to do their job.  Does that make any sense?  And if we don't ask nice enough or if they don't want to do it, we are expected to do it.  Come on!

Guess I needed to vent a little bit.  :)

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Time is still flying!

That patient I wrote about in the previous post...her husband got banned from the hospital because he was taking her pain meds & shooting them up in his arm.  Nice.  

Seems like we are seeing more & more of those type patients since they cracked down on the "pain clinics."  So many drug addicts...and it isn't just being addicted to the meds.  They are shooting them up, snorting them, taking wayyyy too many of them.  I really don't know how they are not overdosing.  It's sad, but we aren't a rehab.  And I'm not saying all of them, but a large majority come in with that selfish attitude & act like we owe them something!  They have attitudes & they aren't pleasant ones.  

I'm not one to judge & hold back on meds.  As long as they are ordered & their vital signs are stable & they are alert & oriented...I'll give what is ordered.  I've always told my new nurses...this isn't intervention.  Just give what is ordered & shake off the attitudes the patients give you.  It isn't personal.  They value a drug more than life itself & we aren't going to change that in the 12 hours that they are in our care.  Besides, they aren't here for help...they are here because they can't afford the drugs on the street & in the hospital they are free.  

Needless to say, I've had a very light schedule for summer.  Two shifts a week & relaxing the rest of the time.  I was getting close to the feeling of being burnt I took a break.  I refuse to allow work to stress me out.  It isn't worth it.  The only things that matter to me are health, family & friends.  Life is too short to take everything else too seriously.  

This is the first year that I've noticed what a negative work place that being a bedside nurse really is.  I mean we take care of sick people.  They are stressed & venting to us in order to feel a little better.  We are taking care of people who may not necessarily truly be sick physically, but mentally they are very sick & again...attempt to drain us mentally.  I see people would rather drag us down to their level than to break free from the stress & make changes in order to be happy.  I don't know why it took me so many years to see how draining a bedside nurse's job really is.  

I still love my patients (well, most of them).  I love the hours.  I love that when I walk out the door at the end of a shift, all the stress stays in those doors.  I refuse to take it home.  Although there are times where I feel it creeping in (perhaps more hormone related) & I immediately address it.  I am not going to let stress get me.  I don't thrive off stress or drama.  

Looks like I just destressed  Whatever it takes.  

Sunday, May 12, 2013

What the ????????

Soooooo I went into work last night & upon entering my patient's room, she tells me she's burning up - yet she has the covers pulled up to her chin.  Me being the clever one that I am...suggested she take the blanket off.  She agrees & throws off her sheet & blanket & guess what!  She is dressed in navy blue scrubs....just like me & every other nurse in the hospital.  What the ???????  I felt like I was in an episode of that movie...what's it called...the one where the roommate tried to look exactly like the star in the movie....Single, White Female.  Creepy!  She then proceeds to tell me that it is her "going home" outfit, but since she wasn't going to be discharged tonight...could she please have a gown.  Huh???  

This is the same patient who the night before wanted to take a shower & had a doctor's order okaying it.......with her husband.  Who am I to object?  It is all about patient satisfaction, right????  

Just when I thought I had seen it all!!!

Happy Mother's Day!

Friday, May 10, 2013

Renewed Effort!

I have decided that I need to make more of an effort when it comes to, I will try to post at least once a week.  Here goes....

I get the pleasure of working this weekend....yay me!  I already put in 2 days this week & will finish up with Fri & Sat.  A little bit of overtime which is what I really could use.  Work has been tough though.  I don't mean mentally...I mean physically.  Funny how that changes as you gain more experience.  I mean maybe it always has been physically demanding & I was too focused on the overwhelming mentally draining side of it.  I guess one good thing is that is helping keep me fit.  I mean when you run around for 5 miles in a shift...that is a pretty good workout.  Even with having pct's to help out, we still seem to be running around like crazy.  Of course having 5 patients sometimes does not make life any easier.  We have some new pct's being trained....younger & more eager because they are brand new on the job.  Some of our current pct's know exactly what they can get away with it & use it to their advantage.  I try to be understanding....I've been there.  It is not an easy job.  Hopefully things will fall into place though.

This patient satisfaction measure of hospitals is turning our patients into spoiled brats.  Seriously...I am not being sarcastic.  We always have at least 50% who are decent, normal human beings who are there for health care & to get better & to get back to their decent, normal human being life outside of the hospital.  The other 50%...oh lord.  I can't even say it is psych issues....of course that may account for 20%.  They are who they are & they can't help it.  But that last 30%....they make me smile, laugh, chuckle...remind me that life is full of surprises.

I actually had a female patient get mad at me the other night because she forgot to bring her makeup to the hospital & wanted me to get her some.  Ummmmm, say what?  Makeup?  Like I'm going to run over to the mall or Target & pick her up some makeup.  Seriously?  I had another female patient get mad because I would not rub her thighs.  Hello!!!!!!  Not happening...ever. I can guarantee you I will not be rubbing any female's thighs (probably not even my own) EVER!!!!!!!  There are some lines I have drawn that will not be crossed.  I can get you some ice cream or apple sauce though, how's that?  :)

I am proud of myself.  Since mid-March I have been working out on a continuous basis.  I've missed a week or two here and week because I was sick as a dog and just recently because I had dental surgery & there was no way I was in any mood to add to the pain I was already feeling.  Of course the only time since mid-March I have lost any weight was those two weeks I missed.  When I was sick...I lost 10 lbs.  It found me as soon as I got back to the gym.  And this last time with dental surgery, I lost 7 lbs.  But it's back.  Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!  I'm trying my hardest not to focus on that scale.  I know it will take more than a couple months of working out to make much of a difference, but it would be nice if I could stop losing & regaining the same 10 lbs.  My clothes are looser, so I know I'm losing some inches.  I've been doing cardio & weights.  I feel so good after working out.  It is hell sometimes getting my booty to the gym, but afterwards I am stress free & happy.  I've been going to Planet Fitness & it's great.  The price is great, the people are nice & my fellow gym members are all courteous but not overly friendly.  My only drawback is the number of elderly people there......and it's not because I don't like elderly just makes me wonder if I'll still be dragging my booty to the gym for the next 40 years.  Gasp!  I do get a kick out of them...especially the husband/wife teams.  They are just so damn cute.  Maybe it's a hobby because 95% of them are thin & certainly don't need to lose weight.  

Then again, with my hospital heavily pushing the "Healthy 100" marketing campaign, maybe that's what these people are doing...trying their best to make it to 100 yrs old.  That is not really my dream, but like all things in life, I am being forced to join the program.  It started out being optional & they would encourage us with promises of a free water bottle or towel or some other crap to make us sign up.  I started to...but then resisted - because back then I preferred to be lazy.  This year it is mandatory & although I understand they want us to be healthier (probably so we won't call in sick very often & lower insurance rates)...I think it is also a personal invasion.  I don't think my workplace needs to know all of my lab results, what I eat or even how much I weigh.  It is my damn business.  If at any time, it hinders me from doing my job----then call me on it.  Otherwise, keep your nose out of my personal life.  Yeah, I can say that on my blog...but we all know it isn't an option, unless I want to get a job somewhere else.  

And in other crazy news...I just sent the new Galaxy S4 back to T-Mobile. What was I thinking?  I mean...why the heck did I even order it?  And why did I order it over the phone instead of going directly to a T-Mobile store???  Why why why??????  Cause I had to pay $15 to have it shipped to me & now I just had to pay $28 to ship it back.  It cost more to ship it back because I wanted signature confirmation & I had to insure the package for $700.  So that's what...$43 just in shipping.  Plus I have to pay a $50 restocking fee - didn't see that fine print until after the phone arrived.  So $93 to try out the hottest phone for 3 days.  Oh well!  I just didn't like it.  I will never be one of those people that is staring at my phone 20 hours a day.  I'm not the most social person, but I am no phone addict either & never want to be.  I love my Windows phone.  The only problem won't recharge the battery anymore.  I ended up buying a separate battery charger on Ebay & am hoping that is the solution to my problems.  However, if not.....T-Mobile just announced they'll be selling a new Windows phone on May 22nd.  So that is my plan B.  Life has returned to normalcy in Jen-world.  Expensive lesson, but well learned.  NEVER ever buy a phone online or through customer service online.  Go directly to the store & if they don't have it in stock...then wait.

I should be sleeping right now since I have to head to work in less than 6 hrs.  I'm wide awake....uh oh!

Have a great weekend, my friends!

Wednesday, May 1, 2013


How is it May already?  I swear it was just the beginning of the year & then I blinked & it is May!  

Work seems to be getting better...or maybe my tolerance for all the b.s. is getting higher.  We are no longer 3 patients to 1 nurse - not that they ever really kept us at that ratio.  We are now 4 patients to 1 nurse and we get 2 techs at night.  Dayshift has the same ratio, but they get 4 techs.  Hopefully we will be staffed appropriately & not just randomly have techs.   They say they want us to get back to being nurses.  ABOUT TIME!  Of course we still have to kiss ass.  Our manager told us today we are not allowed to say "no" to a patient.  That we must find a way to meet whatever needs they have.  This is just so unrealistic.  I had a patient last week ask me to rub her thighs.  Ummm, the answer is NO.  I am a nurse, not a massage therapist.  I am never going to be rubbing some stranger's thighs...ever.  Never ever ever ever.

I went today for a dental procedure called an apicoectomy.  I am not a wimp when it comes to dental procedures.  I don't like them, but I can tolerate them.  I was told it would 30-40 min procedure.  I declined IV sedation (I am an idiot) & opted for a Valium & some Novacain.  If I had a do over...I would pay the $350 for sedation.  The procedure ended up being 70 min of torture.  I've been home now for 7 hours & actually feel ok.  Not sure if my 4 rounds of Novacain have worn off yet or the Vicodin & Ibuprofen are doing their job, but I feel ok.  Sore, but tolerable.  Hopefully the next 24-48 hrs will be ok.  

Wish me luck!

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Poor Social Skills

Here it is...the beginning of my 9th year in nursing.  My oh my has it changed in 9 years.  When I think back to my first couple of years compared to is beyond ridiculous all the responsibilities piled onto the nursing staff.  We do the jobs of doctors, pharmacists, respiratory techs, phlebotomists, housekeepers, waitresses, customer service reps, people pleasers, ass name it, we are probably somehow responsible for it or will be.  The question I have is...when do we get to be nurses???

I blame the govt for a lot of these changes.  That stupid survey patients...I mean "customers" get after their stay at a hospital.  If they don't answer every question with "always", it is like they are answering "never."  It is impossible to make everyone happy ALL of the time while they are in the hospital.  No longer does it matter that we helped them get better or maybe even saved their life.  The survey doesn't ask that.  It asks if their room was clean enough or if the hallways were quiet enough or if the nurses communicated enough or if they learned every side effect of every medication they were given.  Did the doctor communicate enough?  We always seem to fail in that category.

Anyways, that isn't my grievance right now.  It is a survey written by the govt...we are expected to fail.  I only wish we could take a survey in regards to whether we are satisfied with our govt & if they don't receive the answer "always"...that they too fail & have to give us money back.  

My grievance is with my manager.  She's a kind, wonderful person...but she is lacking in social skills.  I'm not even sure if she realizes how rude she sounds, but she is killing our unit morale.  And even though she has an "open door policy" one dares to try to correct her because we don't want to be on her bad side.  She's been in this position a little over a year, so I realize the stress is probably eating her alive.  I've decided to just let everything in one ear & out the other.  Until she sits me down & speaks to me one on one about something "I" have done...I'm not gonna let her stress be contagious to me.  That's the thing about admin...rather than going to the source of the problem or complaint, they lump us all in & tell us it is all our fault & that we need to correct it.  Ummmmm, go directly to the source please & leave the rest of us who are doing our jobs correctly alone.  

Ok, enough of me being Debbie Downer.  I am starting my 9th year.  Wow, just wow!  There are still moments when I wonder how the heck did I even venture into nursing.  I am grateful for whatever led me down this path.  I am self sufficient.  I have a flexible schedule.  I refuse to get burnt out.  I am balancing work with home life.  I seem to have it far...this year.  It's only we shall see how the rest of the year goes.

This past weekend I went to two concerts.  Justin Bieber on Friday night and Luke Bryan on Saturday night.  I only went to Bieber because my 16 yr old niece loves him & I was able to fulfill a wish of my best friend's 10 yr old daughter.  She had no clue we were going & only told her as we were standing in front of the arena.  She broke down into tears.  Such raw sweet.  I think it is something I never will forget.  As much as I really can't stand the Bieb, seeing those two girls smiles was well worth it.  That & knowing 24 hrs later I'd be seeing my favorite singer in the whole wide world........LUKE BRYAN!!!!!!  

I knew he'd make it to the big league when I saw him for the first time 2 years ago.  Now he's headlining his own tour & it seems to be selling out at every venue.  He is well worth every dime & his tickets are like half the price of everyone else.  He is simply amazinggggggggggg!!!!!!!!

I have started a little side business on Ebay, but I don't think it is going to last very long.  I got some really good deals on clothing from Victoria's I put some up for auction.  I've made a little money, but I'm not sure it is worth the aggravation of waiting for people who won the auction to actually pay, pack things up for shipping & all that jazz.  Part of me says just take it all back to the store & give up...but I'll give it another week & see what happens.

Happy New Year everyone...sorry it's a little late.  :)