Still awake

I'm still awake when I should be sleeping. I haven't done any of the EKG homework - maybe I should start that, it would probably put me right to sleep. I can't wait for the day when I can come home & not have any class type stuff to do - no more studying, no more assignments - just come home & relax.

I'm watching "City of Angels"....I love this movie. I remember the first time I watched it years ago & cried a few times throughout the movie. I love the song from this movie..."In the Arms of an Angel." Supposedly it's about cocaine use or something like that, but I believe there are angels among us guiding us along the way. It's at the part now where the patient coded & died. Which reminds me - I've watched a few codes now & it amazes me how light-hearted some of the staff working the codes are. Like one doctor kept talking about how he had to go to the bathroom or in his medical terminology "I need to pee." How professional, isn't he? I don't know - I guess it comes with time, where you just distance yourself from the fact that it is a real person laying there dying, but I'm not sure I want to ever be that way. They do get the job done, they aren't slacking in any way - but some of the discussions I've heard as they are stabilizing the patient just amazes me.

I've been reading a couple of other journals on here about nursing students or graduate nurses. Weird to have so much in common with someone you don't even know. One is talking about her careplans taking 9 hours to complete - I remember those days & don't miss them one bit. So time consuming & the grade is only worth like 10% of your grade. Oh well, those days are behind me...yay!

Kelly came by yesterday. She's working on an oncology floor. She seems to be enjoying it. She is one that has always known from the start of nursing school that she wanted to work in oncology. I have no idea how she knew this is what she wanted to do - especially when she gets grossed out by phlegm & vomit. Meanwhile, both Gina & I thought we would be in the labor & delivery area, yet here we are in progressive care and most likely eventually post-op open heart surgery. How did this happen? I made the decision because I think in the long run it is better to get experience in critical care. It's easy to go into labor & delivery anytime - not much changes in that area. But the demand for critical care nurses in the future is going to increase as the baby boomers start getting older. And if I'm going to be a travel nurse, I need to have the experience that is in demand. I haven't heard of too many traveling OB nurses. I'm sure they are out there, but I think critical care is the place to be right now for me. It still amazes me - I can't believe I'm a nurse. I had a guy ask me the other night "so what do you do for a living?" Ummmmm........I'm a nurse. It felt weird to say that...lol.

Life is strange with its twists & turns. About 4 years ago (this month) I was laid off from my job at Federal Sign. Then I became a building contractor & now a nurse. What's next??? And one year ago this week Kelly's friend Dave passed away after taking a jog during firefighting school. I still can't believe he's gone. That was the last funeral I went to......I went to the wake to comfort Kelly & I ended up being the one crying & Kelly had to comfort me! They gave him a firefighter's burial - so many fire engines, police cars & ambulances. If you've got to go, that is the way to go out.

So here it is, January 2005, and I am a nurse. Go figure!